Suspiria Remake? Yea or Nay

 I just saw this article on FearNet about the remake of one of my favorite movies EVAH, Dario Argento's Suspiria. I'm not really sure how I feel about this... it was such a highly-stylized and visually stunning film that honestly, I fear any attempt at a remake will fail miserably. Horribly. Grotesquely. I'm not one to automatically pan a reboot of an old classic because if done correctly, it works. Ocean's 11, Scarface, and Dawn of the Dead were all re-imagined into movies that, in my opinion, didn't completely suck donkey balls. In fact, I think they're almost better than the originals. (Forgive me Father Romero.)
 I think my main contention with this "new" Suspiria is the director, David Gordon Green, since he's primarily known for comedies. The guy who directed The Pineapple Express and Your Highness (which blew) isn't exactly who comes to mind when I think of someone to tackle all the awesome that is/was the original Suspiria. I just hope to gawd he doesn't turn it into some sort of tragically unfunny "dark comedy" because I will just absolutely die. DIE, I SAY! I mean, I've seen the trailer for what the hell they did to Dark Shadows and I swear a little part of me died that day. Holy shit on a shingle is that a fucking letdown. Dark Shadows as a comedy. Wow.
But I digress...
The Suspiria remake is in production as we speak and is slated for release next year. Let's just hope for the best, shall we? Let's hope that Green doesn't totally beat the style and life right out of it. I'm crossing my fingers for a pleasant surprise but I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm going to get my heart stomped out. Eh, whatareyagonnado, right?

GPOYW. (Me, thinking of this remake.)


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